You know, I’m a reality tv junkie. I’m not always proud of this considering what trash is on these shows sometimes. Not only are people crude and violent but they are usually sexually active and the producers of the shows don’t do a whole lot to censor them either. As a grown adult, I feel that I have had good examples of love in my life to distinguish between true Love and this MTV style love. But then again, I cannot completely deny that I am impervious to media either. Sometimes I think about all the kids who grow up in families and don’t know what real love is. I worry that this is the example that they get. That they will grow up thinking that a Shot of Love with Tila Tequilla is really the way to determine who you love and who loves you back.
For those of you who don’t know the premise of the show, Tila is this bi-sexual girl who gets 15 girls and 15 guys in one house and they compete doing different contests to find out which one is Tila’s true love. The ironic thing is that most of these shows (Flavor of Love, Rock of Love & Shot at Love) all are in their 2nd and 3rd seasons. The first “love” didn’t work out.
When I turned off my television set thinking about how skewed this view of love really was – I kept thinking about a very popular verse from 1 Corinthians (13:4-8).
Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, (love) is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
So many phrases in this simple few verses contradict these television shows. The whole of these shows is centered around one person. This one person – a celebrity – is looking out for their one true love. It’s funny because the celebrity is never once questioned about whether or not they are really just seeking their own interest (increased fame? just sex? popularity?) or the interest of the others
I think too many times people think of love as a feeling. As a “connection.” That’s what these people keep saying on these shows, “We had a strong connection right from the beginning.” And as the show progresses that connection vocabulary gets replaced with love or it doesn’t. I suppose a lot of us judge possibility for love this way. We meet someone and we’re either attracted to them or not. But how can a talent contest where people dress in skimpy little outfits really determine if the other person can help you be a better person… Can be patient and kind to you… How does a dance contest show you that someone is not seeking their own interests? These contest win more one-on-one time with the celebrity – but what do they do at their alone time? Make out? How does this get to know the person beyond physicality?
If you read Proverbs 31, it talks about how to find a wife. Now taking into account that this was written quite some time ago, some of the prerequisites for finding a good wife are a little out of date – for example being able to ply a spindle or being able to to turn wool and flax into clothing. But the point is that finding someone who is a good wife – or a true love – means that she’s got her stuff together. She’s a hard worker and brings good to her lover (v.12), loves and cares for the poor (v. 20), dignified and respected among others around her (v. 25).
Think about it this way: Isn’t it a bit disconcerting that there must be multiple seasons of a search for “true love”? Don’t these people realize that true love is supposed to last? Isn’t the definition of insanity doing the same thing and expecting different results?
Think about it. How do you define love? Is it more Corinthians style, or MTV style?
Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who loves the LORD is to be praised. (Proverbs 31:30)
By Reader